Author: Sarah Tauber

Stepping off the treadmill

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

When I was working, I had this image in my head that Friday nights I would step off the treadmill for the weekend and return to it Monday morning at 7:00 am. Since retiring, the image has changed.  As long as I am doing the things I love, I see myself as fully participating in life. When I am forced to cease and desist due to illness, as I have been for the last seven days, the image is one of being taken out of the flow of life and made to sit on the sidelines. I don’t like the sidelines. I don’t know if you are like me in this regard but I love accomplishing, achieving and successfully stepping out of my comfort zone. Those things make me feel alive, excited and happy. Being stuck at home, either in bed or on the couch, trying to sleep, watching mind-numbing television or reading a book is okay for a day or two. After that I feel deprived.

As a very young child I was expected to take naps during the day. I remember struggling to sleep because I knew that I was missing out on something wonderful on the other side of my bedroom door. I think eventually my mother gave up on the whole nap idea as it clearly wasn’t happening. I rarely, if ever take a nap these days. I have to be very tired and already finished with what I wanted to do that day; i.e., it has to be timed just right so that I don’t feel cheated on possibilities. Is that neurotic? Probably, in some harmless way I suppose.

In my defense, my husband is worse! Although he does take occasional naps, he rarely rests. I am the opposite. I know how to rest and relax.

Mondays are typically my days at home. I try not to go anywhere. I do laundry, light housekeeping, bookkeeping and most important, re-group for the week ahead. I cherish Mondays and my time alone. I have learned that it is not only pleasant but necessary for my well being and general mood. The rest of the week I am on the go but Monday is my day without a schedule. Consequently I love that day of the week. Funny, I used to hate it when I was a working girl.

However, having seven “Mondays” in a row now is really taking a good thing to its ridiculous extreme. No thank you!

This afternoon I feel like my body has turned the corner and I am on the mend. (Fingers crossed.) I am ready to get back to living my life, riding my horse, visiting friends and participating in a soon to be book event and a trip up north.

How easy it is to take your life for granted until you are forced to sit on the sidelines. Some day I will be too old to do most of these things and then I will close my eyes to remember what it was like to have a busy, wonderful life. Until then, it’s “Wait for me ! I’ll be right there!”   :))

La Familia

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

When I hear the word “family” my mind sees a picture of my husband, sister, children and their respective spouses. And of course all of my grandchildren. (7) If I think about it long enough, the picture expands to include grandparents (long since departed), Aunts and Uncles (also gone) and cousins (only two left).

Not everyone thinks of relatives when they think of family. Not everyone likes their family or certain members of it. Their mind goes to close friends. Wherever your mind goes, I think you will agree that the word conjures up warm feelings. It has a positive connotation for most of us.

This past weekend my husband and I were in Chicago, Illinois for the graduation of our eldest grandchild, Alex, from Navy boot camp. We were there with my son, Alex’s younger brother Christian, Alex’s mom (my son’s ex) and her parents. You might think that it was uncomfortable being with the “ex family” but we get along quite well. In fact we spent the entire day together, going into downtown Chicago and sightseeing. Both sides of Alex’s family wanted to take advantage of the eight hour time allotment that Alex was given. He had to be back at the base by 7:30pm. He would be leaving early the following morning for Pensacola, Florida, his home for the next eight months.

That was Friday. Saturday we were on our own – me, my husband, my son and Christian. We decided to take a road trip to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin (beautiful resort town) and Lake Delavan where my husband spent summers growing up. (He is from Chicago.) My son’s wife could not be with us because she is in her ninth month of pregnancy and could not fly.

Saturday night we met two of my husband’s sisters, their husbands, as well as two of his nieces and the husband of one of them. There were eleven of us for dinner. Two of them are not on speaking terms and so we placed them at opposite ends of the table. Another potentially awkward situation but everyone was on their best behavior.

We ate at an old Italian restaurant (opened in 1937) where the food was amazing even though for that particular night the service was not. No matter. I enjoyed two glasses of a delicious pinot noir and only felt love and joy. A wonderful time was had by all. It could have been less than enjoyable, given the circumstances, but it wasn’t. It was perfect.

It started me thinking about family and how special the times are when we can be together, considering that most of us live in different parts of the country. Even when we live in the same general area we don’t see each other often because our lives are so busy. That’s a shame. Hundreds of years ago it was not that way. Families lived under the same roof when the parents got older. This is true today in cultures other than our own.

I left Chicago with a warmth in my heart that I hope will remain for a long time. People aren’t perfect; families aren’t perfect but they are the families we were given.

We are sharing this life together and most of us do the best that we can with what we have. Learn to forgive, reach out, and embrace those family members you would rather ignore. If your efforts are rejected, bless them and let them go.

Cherish the family you have, whether it is the one you were given or the one you chose. Enjoy the blessings that follow.

For the love of horses…

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

I have always appreciated the beauty of horses but never owned one until 2006. As a young girl I was fortunate to take lessons on a horse named “Honeyboy”, a beautiful paint gelding. I decided, being a willful young lady, that I would save up my allowance and purchase him. By the time I had saved  maybe $100, my father announced that we were moving – to another state! My young heart was broken. I recovered and after the move forgot about horses for many years.

Fast forward to 2002. While visiting Sequoia National Park with family and friends, we went on a trail ride through the hills. It was fun but not enough to turn me into the crazy horse lady that I am today. There were a few other trail rides on vacations with the same result, no desperate need to own a horse.

In December 2005 at a church silent auction, I bid on an hour session with an Icelandic horse and won. As I was riding this beautiful animal, it hit me. I knew I wanted to pursue riding. The horse’s owner told me that the barn had a regular trainer who could give me lessons. I contacted her and by taking this step, my world had expanded.

By August of 2006 I was in the market for my own horse. Thus began my journey into the equine world. Initially I rode “western” and felt every bit the cowgirl. My husband bought a horse and for a few years we rode together.  We moved our horses to a barn closer to home where I continued to work with a trainer.

One thing you learn and often too late is that choosing the right horse for you is like choosing a mate. You and your horse should have similar or at least compatible personalities. Secondly,  your horse should enjoy whatever riding discipline you are into, be it trail riding, barrel racing, jumping, eventing or dressage. Forcing a horse into a discipline it neither enjoys nor is good at is tantamount to animal cruelty. Strong words but my belief.

Once you find the right partner, there is nothing you can’t do together. It took me three horses to get there. My third horse, Barbie, was the one who got sick last December and passed away in January of this year. That led me to my fourth horse, Ruby, who is even more suited to me. She is a treasure.

Another mistake that many people make with horses is seeing them as a pet, like the dog or cat they have at home. No! If you treat your horse like a pet you are putting yourself in a potentially dangerous position. This is not a 50 or even 100 pound dog but a 900-1200 (average) pound animal that can  put you in the hospital or worse if you do not pay attention and have a healthy respect for it.

What do I love about horses? Their sensitivity to the world around them. The fact that they are prey animals and yet learn to trust humans, a.k.a. predators, to ride on their backs! How much trust is involved in this? One can only imagine.

Horses live in the moment. You won’t catch a horse lamenting over the past or worrying about tomorrow.

They are mentors who teach you how to be present. Horses only know the now.

Horses are used as therapists for the disabled and veterans with PTSD. Successful work with autistic children has also been documented.

Because of their innate sensitivity, you can “cue” your horse while on its back with such subtlety that no one watching will know what you have done. Watch a rider during a dressage performance. The horse will walk, trot, canter, do precise circles of different circumferences, lead changes, transitions, etc. and you will think it was all the horse’s idea and not the rider.

There are moments while riding your horse when you are so in sync that you feel like one creature instead of two. These are the moments riders live for.

Horses are beautiful, spiritual, trusting, generous creatures. You would be blessed to know one.

 

Selfie of me and Ruby 2

 

Listen to your body!

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

In the last few years I have gotten much better at tuning in to my body and paying attention to what it tells me. Maybe that’s because I’m so much older now! Yes, I believe as we age our body talks to us more than ever before, and every year with more frequency. By listening to your body I don’t mean that as soon as you feel pain you reach for the nearest painkiller in your medicine cabinet. No – although some of us have been doing that for years. I’m talking about subtle whisperings as well as the loud voice of pain.

When you start really listening to your body and then accommodating it, I believe it will return the favor. If your body says, “I’m really tired today. Please take it easy.” That is not the time to say, “Oh, you’re just being a wuss. Get out there and go the gym! How do you think you’re going to stay in shape?” How many people actually listen and do what their body asks? I have no idea but my guess would be a small number. Why? Because today it is all about doing, accomplishing, succeeding. No rest for the weary, right?

At my wise old age (although I don’t feel old) I’m not only listening more but doing what I’m told. As a result, I believe I have a symbiotic relationship with my body. “If I listen to you, will you take care of me?”

“Yes.”

“Alright then.”

Sometimes I will get a pain ( I used to work for a man who said after the age of 50 there isn’t a day that goes by when something doesn’t hurt!) but know instinctively that it is nothing serious. I then practice something that my husband taught me. “Don’t give it any energy.” That means don’t focus on it. Focus on something completely different. Have you ever noticed that whatever you give your attention to will grow? If my feet hurt, for example, and I concentrate on how much they hurt, do you think that the pain will go away or get worse? Guess what? It gets worse! I remember being on vacation years ago and I woke up with a severe pain on the bottom of my left foot. (I learned later that it was plantar fasciitis.) I checked it out and decided that it was a very inconvenient time for me to have it since I was on vacation.  I told it to go away! It left me within minutes and I have never had since!

Before I subject my feet to high heels I make a deal with them. If you help me wear these heels for the next four hours, I promise to remove them and set you free afterwards. Does this sound strange to you? Probably. But do you know what? It works, every time.

I once read about the co-founder of the Unity Church, Myrtle Fillmore.  (Read her book, “Healing Letters”. It is inspirational.) She was struck with tuberculosis as well as other ailments when she was a fairly young woman.  And this was in the 1800s, not today with our advancements in medicine and technology. She started meditating every day. She would go through her body and bless each part, thanking it for the work it does for her. (There is more to the story. Look it up if interested.) After doing this for several months she was cured and lived to be 86! So when one of my body parts is unhappy, I bless it with gratitude and let my negative thoughts float away.

There is so much written about mind over matter and cases of miracles occurring every day in the areas of health and well being. It is up to you to believe or not believe. I personally choose to believe.

I get up every morning, get on the floor and stretch as well as exercise. This morning, out of the blue, I heard from my arms, “No pushups or planks today, please. We need a break.” I listened.

Listening to your body and getting to understand what it is saying is as important to me as having an annual checkup. No one knows your body better than you do. Pay attention to what it says. If you don’t, it will only get louder and may become something you would rather not deal with. You take care of your body and it will reward you for it.   :))

Good things come to those who wait ……….sometimes.

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

This used to be my mantra. I believed that if I was patient enough, everything I ever wanted (including a husband) would fall into my life. Waiting was the key.

For years I tried the whole patience thing. Don’t get me wrong;  patience truly is a virtue, when you have no choice.  For example, sitting in traffic, waiting in line at the Post Office or for the clouds to blow over and the sun to shine. All good examples of the need for patience. I’m sure you have a few examples of your own to add.

Other than scenarios where you have no control, patience be damned! Don’t wait for what you want! Don’t hope that it shows up on your doorstep,  in your bank account, or in your driveway! Ask for what you want! People who ask are ten times more likely to get what they want than are those who quietly and patiently wait, hoping. Is it that easy? Yes…………and no.

Asking for what you want takes courage, planning, confidence, timing and patience. (There’s that word again.) You must have all of the above before taking the plunge.  Easy? Not exactly. But if you use these tools, you will have a better chance of being successful.

Sometimes it requires boldness. I recently went to Cuba with my husband. To reduce the cost of our trip, I proposed to my travel agent that I would do a travelogue in exchange for my portion (1/2). I came up with the idea because the travelogue on their website was outdated and never mentioned the travel agency. I wrote a proposal which made sense and pointed out its value to the company. In my favor were the following facts: I am a published writer, including journals. I am well traveled and have been on many tours.

It took patience and follow up on my part but in the end, I was successful! Not only did they accept my proposal but they purchased 100 of my books (“The Story She Had to Tell”) to give as gifts to people taking the Cuban tour. This book, a novel, takes place in Cuba in the 1950s

In the end I got more than I asked for, all because of a creative idea and all five of the necessary requirements I mentioned earlier: courage, planning, confidence, timing and patience. A crazy idea turned into a win-win for everyone involved.

The thing about asking for what you want is that there are no guarantees. You must be prepared to hear the word “No.” Or you might get lucky like I did, where all the stars align. But this is not always the case. Then again, what do you have to lose? If you get all of your ducks in a row and the answer comes back “No”, then your position in life has not changed. You are right where you were before the ask. If you get a “Yes,” your position has been elevated. Hallelujah!

In summary, patience is best used in situations of little to no control. In other scenarios, “Ask for what you want.” (Remembering the five tools.)

In light of my new familiarity with the bible,  I feel compelled to say that part of asking for what you want is asking God. That reminds me of two sayings, one from Science of Mind and the other a biblical reference. “Pray with your feet moving” and “God helps those who help themselves.” Just some more food for thought!  🙂

I’d like you to meet my new friend, Jesus

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

I get the inspiration for my blogs from things that happen to me or lessons I have recently learned that I have yet to share. On Father’s Day my older son and his family came over for a cookout. After dinner we watched a DVD of a comedian named Michael Jr. You probably have not heard of him. I hadn’t either. He is a very funny Christian comedian who actually performed at my grandson’s church on Father’s Day. My son bought his DVD after the performance. I laughed until tears ran down my face. Very funny guy. And clean humor, too. Something rare these days.

The following day I wanted to google him to see if I could find the same DVD. I thought I would purchase it to watch again some time. I found the DVD but also a 30 minute YouTube video which had some new material on it. I was home alone and decided to watch it because I knew it would be funny. It was, until the last ten minutes of the video when he spoke of Jesus.  He used an analogy saying that we are all individual houses and Jesus wants to come into our house.

Let me share with you my religious background. I grew up in a Christian family. My father played the organ and was the choir director at our church which was across the street from our house. My sister and I were in the choir and my mother helped with community functions and rummage sales. (There’s a word you don’t hear anymore!) My sister and I went to Sunday School every Sunday. Only illness would keep us from going.

When we moved from that town (this was outside of Providence, Rhode Island) I was eight years old. We not only left the town, we left the state. We moved to Philadelphia, PA where for a while we attended a Methodist Church.  That fell by the wayside and soon we had stopped going to church altogether. And so it went for many years. There was one summer I attended a Catholic Church with my mother, but just for the summer.

Years later, as an adult, I found the Science of Mind Church in Huntington Beach, CA where my sister had been going for some time. I started going there and have gone to one of their churches every since. I was perfectly happy with their teaching. It was more philosophical and scientific than religious, but it suited me (and my current husband) just fine. Until I listened to Michael Jr.

He guided us through a process. As I began the process, I merely thought of it as interesting and I wanted to see where it would lead. He said that Jesus wants to come into your house but he will not force his way in. Only you have the power to let him in. The doorknob is on your side of the door. He said that most of us open the door a crack, just enough to ask a favor of Him and then we close it again. We don’t want him to see the mess in our house, which, as it turns out, is the mess in our lives. What we don’t realize is that Jesus would gladly come in and help us clean up.

The process continued. It caught me by surprise and before I realized it I was crying. I was crying and then I was letting Jesus into my house! Afterward I contacted my younger son in Oregon who is a Christian. I relayed the story to him. He was very happy, as you can imagine. He said he would be my mentor and anytime I had questions, I should not hesitate to ask. He also gave me assignments. As it turns out, the Bible he wanted me to read (“New Believers” Bible) I already had in my possession. Not that I had ever read it, but I still had it. Incredibly, I was able to locate it. It has been ten years since I last laid eyes on it.

He told me to start with John. Then he also told me to watch the movie, “Son of God” which came out last year. I did. It was a powerful film and very well done. After finishing John, I asked for my next assignment. “What did you learn?” Ah, so I can’t slide, just because it’s my son. And so I told him. “Good. Next I want you to read Romans.” And on it goes.

Ever since this “happened” to me, I have felt differently. Things in my life seem to work themselves out and I am basically happier. I also feel closer to God.

Why am I telling you this? Because it is something significant that happened to me. Because if you haven’t heard Michael Jr. then you should listen to him. If you haven’t seen the movie, “Son of God” you should watch it. It is a beautiful film. Because maybe there is something missing in your life that you just can’t put your finger on. And finally, just so you know that it is okay to go back to something you believed a long, long time ago and start to believe it again, if it feels right.

I remember one Science of Mind minister telling us that Christianity served us well as children. But now that we were adults, we needed to move on to something more. I actually feel the opposite. Science of Mind is a great philosophy. It has many teachings that I believe in and will continue to follow. But clearly it was time I reached for something more. And so I did. And it feels right and it feels good.

Amen. :))

Sometimes it’s hard to be mature

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

I consider myself to be a fairly responsible and mature adult. I don’t think about it. I just go about my day and take certain things for granted, like I will respond to life with dignity and poise and rarely, if ever, lose my cool. I was stopped short recently when I read an email on my phone from someone I rarely hear from. I immediately felt a pang of jealousy so strong it threw me off my usual equilibrium! I didn’t like feeling that way. It was highly unpleasant and left me, in addition to feeling jealous, feeling depressed. The little voice in my head told me, you could stew in this and be miserable or you could choose to feel differently about it.

I’m smart enough to know that when you change your attitude about something, you can make yourself feel better both physically and mentally. And so that is what I did. But it wasn’t that fast. It took me a while to actually get there. To believe in my new reaction I had to settle in and talk myself into the new outlook. I have to admit that even now (3 days later), I am only 90% there. And that may not change. That may be as far as I get and that’s okay. It’s much better than the feelings I had initially.

The whole process started me thinking.  As ‘together’ as we often believe ourselves to be, once in a while something comes along to test us. Sometimes we pass and sometimes we fail. But no worries, the failure can be turned around in minutes, hours, days, months or even years later. That is the beauty of free will and choice. We can always choose to see things differently, anytime we wish.

In my case, I needed to choose again in order to rid myself of the yucky feelings I had. I don’t like being depressed or pitiful. It doesn’t sit well with me. I’d rather be happy and see things in a positive light. It’s the way I choose to live my life. That’s not to say that I don’t ever get thrown off my solid foundation. I am human, just like you. I try to be aware, whenever something happens, of how I initially feel about it. That helps me decide whether or not I need to look at the situation differently.  Stop focusing on your feelings for a minute and go into your head. Ask yourself if your current view is promoting your well being or sabotaging it. Then it’s up to you. As I have said before, there are some people who choose to be miserable over their circumstances.  When disappointing things happen, it validates their position and they soldier on with their even heavier burden.

To me, being mature is dealing effectively with the irritants and pitfalls of life. It mean adapting when necessary and changing your attitude when dictated for your own happiness. It’s not always easy, but the benefits to your soul are well worth the effort.

Choose to be happy!  :))

I owe you an apology…

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

There was no blog last week. Not because I didn’t feel like it and not because I wasn’t inspired. I left the country! The few days leading up to our trip were so jam packed and stressful that I completely forgot to sit down at my computer and create something interesting to read. I was a crazy person and therefore no blog was written. Mea culpa.

That being said, let me tell you where we went. CUBA! A dream come true, mostly because of my book, “The Story She Had to Tell”, which takes place in Havana, Cuba in the early 1950s. A love story about a young American woman who travels to Cuba after college with a girlfriend. She meets a rich, handsome Cuban at the Tropicana night club and falls in love. The story evolves from there.

Ninety percent of the story is in Cuba. I had to go there. Of course going to the Tropicana was a necessity. Because we went with a tour group, I was concerned about being able to get away for a night. Even if we had free time in the evening, I was aware that we were in a Communist country and our tour had restrictions on what we could do. As it turned out we had two free evenings and were encouraged to go there if we so desired. I desired!

The Tropicana was amazing, even though for the most part it had been brought forward to 2015. I had wanted to go back in time to see what my characters saw and experienced. The show was great and the singers fantastic. All in all I am very glad we went.

There is so much more to tell and not enough room or time to tell it. I am writing a travelogue for the travel agency we used which I will post on FB within the next couple of weeks. If you are not on FB, send me an email and I will send you a link to the travelogue.

Suffice it to say that it was well worth our time and money. The tour operator and our Cuban guide were incredible. Not only was the trip informative but also very entertaining. The Cuban people are warm, welcoming and hard working. The music is fantastic, the food was delicious and our experience invaluable.

If Cuba is on your bucket list, then I highly suggest you contact YMT Vacations. The cost of the trip is very reasonable and you will get back in memories considerably more than you paid.

Below are a few pictures from our trip. Look for my travelogue for more information and highlights of the tour. Cuba is an experience waiting for you.    :))

Church from book cover Courtyard Old Havana Tropicana

 

 

Perspective – Use it or Lose it!

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

A dear friend of mine is going through a very difficult time. Because of this, everything seems dark in her world. Even minor inconveniences look and feel much larger than they really are. This is a dangerous place to be. When one challenge is facing you, everything else in your life, no matter the weight, takes on a much darker image.  This creates a downward spiral with you at the center. Negative thinking feeds upon negative thinking. What started out as a small or medium sized monster has become King Kong and your hope for survival diminishes with every passing day.

What can be done? It’s called perspective and it can and should become your new best friend. How does it work? When you are experiencing a challenge in your life, try to see it in the grand scheme of things. What is the worst that could happen? Is it life threatening or less than? If, like my friend, more than one thing hits you in a short period of time, you really need to look at everything realistically. The second thing that happened, is it more or less threatening than the first challenge? Perspective means you are seeing something in the context of other, similar issues. Which is worse – getting a parking ticket or falling and spraining your ankle? Breaking your arm or needing open heart surgery? Finding out you have curable cancer or learning that you have a terminal disease? You get the idea. My father used to say, “Everything is relative.”

When I was three years old my mother delivered her third child who was born dead. She clearly was devastated and for a while inconsolable. The only thing that brought her out of it was meeting another woman in the hospital who had not only lost one child but was visiting her terminally ill remaining child. My mother had two healthy daughters at home. As horrible as her experience was, she counted her blessings as she reflected on the other woman’s fate. A beautiful demonstration of perspective.

Gaining perspective is not going to diminish your pain or instantly make your life rosy again. But it will put you in a more positive space where solving problems and meeting challenges can be more effectively accomplished.

The next time you are faced with one or more serious problems, think of a scenario that would be worse and then count your blessings, knowing that your woes are not as bad as they could be. I am reminded of a beautiful message, “If God brings you to it, he will bring you through it.” Can I get an “Amen”?      :))

Delayed gratification – sign of maturity or unnecessary torture?

Posted on by Sarah Tauber

I was standing in line recently at my local postal annex. It immediately became obvious that it would not be a quick “check the box” off my list of things to do. An older woman in front of me turned around and said, “I see you are practicing your delayed gratification skills.” It made me laugh. She was clearly an intelligent woman who had a long life behind her, filled with many interesting stories, I’m sure.

My initial thought after her statement was that I wouldn’t call this particular scenario “delayed gratification”. That would be waiting in line for an ice cream cone, to get a prize or to relax with a nice glass of wine after the day’s chores. But I knew what she meant. We had a nice conversation while both of us practiced patience, that was my take on it.

It started me thinking about delayed gratification. It’s not a concept you consider very often. When I look at my own life, I realize that I could be the queen of delayed gratification! It goes all the way back to my childhood. I was a very disciplined child. I would come home from school, go upstairs and immediately do my homework before getting a snack or going out to play with friends. Crazy, right? To this day I “reward” myself with kicking back and watching my previously taped TV shows only after all tasks have been completed. I have no idea where this discipline came from. Perhaps my father. But he never told me I had to do homework first. That was my idea.

The rewards are so much sweeter to me when my work has been accomplished and I know there is nothing hovering over my head that still has to be done. I do make minor exceptions occasionally, like coming home and eating my lunch before writing my blog because I’m starving! Actually, I can’t think of many times that I don’t delay the gratification. Maybe I need a shrink!

So, is it a sign of maturity to delay your gratification? When it comes to buying things you don’t really need, or buying a higher end version of something you do need; perhaps delaying your purchase until you have more available funds is the mature thing to do. Many younger people, especially, do not believe they should deny themselves the pleasures of life, whether they can afford them or not. Immaturity is what I would call that.

But allowing yourself an ice cream cone before dinner once in a while, splurging on a dress you don’t really need but you know it won’t keep you from paying your bills, relaxing with a glass of wine before you finish chores at home – These things are not immaturity but giving yourself a present, which I believe is healthy behavior when done on occasion.

I believe delayed gratification is overrated. If you can’t actually afford something, don’t buy it! If buying that item will put your family in dire financial straights; well, that’s a no brainer, isn’t it? You shouldn’t make the purchase!

Standing in line when you have many other errands to run is a lesson in patience, not delayed gratification. The same goes for traffic jams. We certainly know about those, living in Southern California. Our patience is tested on a regular basis.

Once in a while have dessert before dinner. Buy the beautiful shoes that you don’t really need but must have – knowing that it won’t break the bank. Uh, see picture below. I did buy the shoes I didn’t need but had to have! Pretty, right? And so practical! I can wear them with many outfits! (Rationalization, a topic for another time.)    :))

pretty shoes