When I hear the word “family” my mind sees a picture of my husband, sister, children and their respective spouses. And of course all of my grandchildren. (7) If I think about it long enough, the picture expands to include grandparents (long since departed), Aunts and Uncles (also gone) and cousins (only two left).
Not everyone thinks of relatives when they think of family. Not everyone likes their family or certain members of it. Their mind goes to close friends. Wherever your mind goes, I think you will agree that the word conjures up warm feelings. It has a positive connotation for most of us.
This past weekend my husband and I were in Chicago, Illinois for the graduation of our eldest grandchild, Alex, from Navy boot camp. We were there with my son, Alex’s younger brother Christian, Alex’s mom (my son’s ex) and her parents. You might think that it was uncomfortable being with the “ex family” but we get along quite well. In fact we spent the entire day together, going into downtown Chicago and sightseeing. Both sides of Alex’s family wanted to take advantage of the eight hour time allotment that Alex was given. He had to be back at the base by 7:30pm. He would be leaving early the following morning for Pensacola, Florida, his home for the next eight months.
That was Friday. Saturday we were on our own – me, my husband, my son and Christian. We decided to take a road trip to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin (beautiful resort town) and Lake Delavan where my husband spent summers growing up. (He is from Chicago.) My son’s wife could not be with us because she is in her ninth month of pregnancy and could not fly.
Saturday night we met two of my husband’s sisters, their husbands, as well as two of his nieces and the husband of one of them. There were eleven of us for dinner. Two of them are not on speaking terms and so we placed them at opposite ends of the table. Another potentially awkward situation but everyone was on their best behavior.
We ate at an old Italian restaurant (opened in 1937) where the food was amazing even though for that particular night the service was not. No matter. I enjoyed two glasses of a delicious pinot noir and only felt love and joy. A wonderful time was had by all. It could have been less than enjoyable, given the circumstances, but it wasn’t. It was perfect.
It started me thinking about family and how special the times are when we can be together, considering that most of us live in different parts of the country. Even when we live in the same general area we don’t see each other often because our lives are so busy. That’s a shame. Hundreds of years ago it was not that way. Families lived under the same roof when the parents got older. This is true today in cultures other than our own.
I left Chicago with a warmth in my heart that I hope will remain for a long time. People aren’t perfect; families aren’t perfect but they are the families we were given.
We are sharing this life together and most of us do the best that we can with what we have. Learn to forgive, reach out, and embrace those family members you would rather ignore. If your efforts are rejected, bless them and let them go.
Cherish the family you have, whether it is the one you were given or the one you chose. Enjoy the blessings that follow.