As an older adult I am very familiar with the act of leaving. And it is never easy for me. Of course there are degrees of difficulty. There is a world of difference between leaving my husband at home in the morning, knowing that I will return in a few hours and leaving one of my adult children, not knowing when I will see them again. It is a pain that goes deep into my heart and only lessens with time. I hate leaving my children or having them leave me.
I was thinking about it today, how some experiences of leaving profoundly effect me. I just spent one week with my youngest son, his loving wife and their new baby boy. Her first child. They live in Oregon. My older son and I helped them move up there 1 1/2 years ago. And then we had to leave. The pain of that leaving was lessened because one of my children was going back with me.
I visited them a year ago on my son’s birthday. Leaving after five days was hard. Leaving them most recently – now three people, one a precious three week old baby – was harder than I had prepared myself for. Eyes filled with tears, my heart ached enough to fill my whole body.
I have been through this many times. I also know that it gets better as every day passes, taking me further away from the “leaving”. I jump back into the things that make my life normal. The greater the immersion the easier the transition.
Your own experience of leaving is all about what you tell yourself. You decide on its meaning. Lots of freedom here.
Leaving is a significant experience, to be sure. You are separating yourself from another. What was two or more is now one – you.
Connections are important. Breaking connections will effect you whether they were temporary or permanent. It is profound, whether the leaving is the best that you can do for yourself or a situation wherein you have no choice.
Leaving can be serious, meaningful, complicated, necessary, painful, temporary, sad, courageous, difficult, forever, honest and real. Whatever it is, leaving changes things. It alters what is. And it is usually hard to do. Maybe that’s why some people exchange the phrase “Goodbye” with “See you later”.
Leaving is an inevitable part of life. When it must be done, do it with grace, love and a little class. It is, after all, the only way to get to the next place you are meant to be. :))