I like order. It makes me feel in control of my life. But as we all know, life is not always neat and tidy, even with our greatest efforts to keep it so. Sometimes chaos slips in when we least expect it and we are thrown out of our orderly world and into one that makes us want to run and hide until it has left. Sound familiar? We should get used to it but we never do. We should expect it to come around occasionally but we forget about it when it is gone, convincing ourselves it will never come back. After all, we weren’t exactly welcoming!
My life currently is an example of unwanted chaos. Nothing heavy, mind you, but nevertheless an unwanted guest who is messing things up as I try to put them neatly into place. Now that I am retired I have a busier schedule than I did when I was working. (You may have heard this from other retirees.) Well, it’s true! There is so much to do and now we finally have the time to do it! Usually on Sunday I lay out the coming week, day by day, with things that either need to get done or that I simply want to do. So on Sunday, before my son and his fiancé came over with my two grandsons, he asked if the youngest could stay with me for a few days. I don’t get to see him often and he is a sweet child, so of course! He would stay three nights and leave on Wednesday. Certainly! It will be fun! I really felt that way but inside my head my organizing brain was saying what about this and what about that? When will you do this? How can you rearrange for that? All fixable, it just added a little disorganization to my organization.
Then an unexpected visit of my niece who lives in Oregon. Not to my house, but her visit brought with it the need to go see her while she was here. When? Well she was staying with her brother, about an hour plus from our house, so maybe (it was originally thought) we could all meet at his house for dinner one night. That could easily be worked out. My sister (her mother) lives about an hour in the opposite direction, so this would be half-way for both of us. Not in the cards. My niece’s son was with her to attend a football camp about 45 minutes from my nephew’s house. (In a different direction altogether) There would be games my niece would want to attend. That took care of the evenings. On Saturday, the day before they were leaving to go back to Oregon and the day of more football games, my sister had a hair appointment which she would now have to cancel as she would be involved with her daughter and grandson. We share a hairdresser, an hour from my house. I needed to change my original hair appointment so maybe I could take hers? But then when do I see my niece? It was finally decided, after much calculating and logistical thought, that my husband and I would drive to my sister’s house Saturday night for dinner, after all games were completed.
Oh, that is not all! I was planning lunch with an old friend for one afternoon (lives an hour from me), and a meeting with another friend that was to be in the evening one night this week. Those were finally scheduled. Oh, yes, and I am trying to plan a big family gathering which involves catering, music, invitations, etc. and a short trip to Oregon next month. I think we are done here.
So, how do you deal with chaos when it comes to visit you? First of all, keep breathing. Take deep breaths when you think about it, several times a day would be good. When you are doing other things, forget about the craziness that is your life. Stay in the moment and enjoy whatever distracting event is going on around you. Take one thing at a time to figure out, not all at the same time. This keeps things more manageable, like taking small bites of food instead of shoving all of it into your mouth at once. If there is anything you can eliminate altogether, eliminate it! One less thing to stress about.
Time helps, too. As time passes, some things work themselves out, so be patient. Things often end up falling into place, despite your fretting.
Now, all of my “issues” have been resolved or are resolving as we speak. My hope is that chaos is packing its bags and getting ready to depart. It might be on its way to see you! :)))