Having an attitude of gratitude is easy when life is going your way. You can be grateful for all of your good fortune, good health, good relationships, etc. I remember growing up learning to be grateful for all that I had. But I never learned to be grateful when I was sick, or when I got punished, or when the boy I had a crush on laughed at me. What is there to be grateful for when things are going wrong? How can you say “Thank you, God” if you are getting a divorce, or your child is seriously ill? Very good question.
I adhere to a belief system called “Science of Mind”. It was founded by a man named Ernest Holmes. He published a book with the same title in 1938. Ernest Holmes took the best from many world religions to form Science of Mind which is a study in consciousness. It is a way of living and being that recognizes the tremendous power we have to change our own lives by changing our thinking. Do you know people who believe their lives are crappy, and their lives are crappy? And then there are people who believe their lives are good and so it is.
Without turning this into a study in religion, let me say that I have learned that being grateful, even in the dark times, can change your outlook and ultimately change your life. Rather than getting up in the morning and focusing on what is wrong in your world, think about all the things that are right with it. If you list them all on a piece of paper, which side is longer, the problem side or the blessings side? And for blessings I mean things like, a roof over my head, some money in my account, food in the cupboard, basically healthy, loving relationships, etc. You will probably find the blessing side much longer than the problem side. And that is something else to be grateful for!
Another thing I have learned from Science of Mind that you may find a little strange. Being thankful for something that hasn’t happened yet initiates your thinking and then your actions which cooperate to bring it into being! If I say, every day, thank you, God, that I have all the money I need this month to pay my bills with a little left over. Saying it every day eventually leads you to believe it and believing in it brings the possibility of it coming true. Try it sometime! Be reasonable, however. If you say, “Thank you, God, for letting me win the lottery” it may not happen. First of all, on some level inside you, you do not believe you will really win. You cannot have any doubt in your mind of the desired effect or it will not materialize.
What about being grateful when things go wrong? First of all, it is we who label what has happened as “bad” or “good”, “horrible” or “wonderful”. We are judging it before the universe has had a chance to work through it. It may take time but eventually you will see that it was for some greater good, some greater learning, perhaps. But as human beings, it is often tough to make that leap of faith. It takes time and doesn’t always feel like something to be grateful about.
So, to make things easier, try this. Be grateful for everything that you have that works. Before you close your eyes at night or when you open them in the morning, start your day with an attitude of gratitude. Be thankful that you woke up! Be thankful for your pets, if you have them. Say “thank you” for the beautiful weather. I always say “thank you” for allowing me and my family to get home safely every day when driving our cars. I am grateful for the abundance in my life, whatever that looks like on a particular day. That I didn’t receive any bad news, from anywhere. You get the idea. Try it for a week and see if it doesn’t change your outlook on life, which then changes your attitude, which changes your behavior and brings joy to you and those around you. Trust that the universe is on your side. My favorite movie quote is from “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”: “Everything will be all right in the end… if it’s not all right then it’s not yet the end.”