I consider myself to be a fairly responsible and mature adult. I don’t think about it. I just go about my day and take certain things for granted, like I will respond to life with dignity and poise and rarely, if ever, lose my cool. I was stopped short recently when I read an email on my phone from someone I rarely hear from. I immediately felt a pang of jealousy so strong it threw me off my usual equilibrium! I didn’t like feeling that way. It was highly unpleasant and left me, in addition to feeling jealous, feeling depressed. The little voice in my head told me, you could stew in this and be miserable or you could choose to feel differently about it.
I’m smart enough to know that when you change your attitude about something, you can make yourself feel better both physically and mentally. And so that is what I did. But it wasn’t that fast. It took me a while to actually get there. To believe in my new reaction I had to settle in and talk myself into the new outlook. I have to admit that even now (3 days later), I am only 90% there. And that may not change. That may be as far as I get and that’s okay. It’s much better than the feelings I had initially.
The whole process started me thinking. As ‘together’ as we often believe ourselves to be, once in a while something comes along to test us. Sometimes we pass and sometimes we fail. But no worries, the failure can be turned around in minutes, hours, days, months or even years later. That is the beauty of free will and choice. We can always choose to see things differently, anytime we wish.
In my case, I needed to choose again in order to rid myself of the yucky feelings I had. I don’t like being depressed or pitiful. It doesn’t sit well with me. I’d rather be happy and see things in a positive light. It’s the way I choose to live my life. That’s not to say that I don’t ever get thrown off my solid foundation. I am human, just like you. I try to be aware, whenever something happens, of how I initially feel about it. That helps me decide whether or not I need to look at the situation differently. Stop focusing on your feelings for a minute and go into your head. Ask yourself if your current view is promoting your well being or sabotaging it. Then it’s up to you. As I have said before, there are some people who choose to be miserable over their circumstances. When disappointing things happen, it validates their position and they soldier on with their even heavier burden.
To me, being mature is dealing effectively with the irritants and pitfalls of life. It mean adapting when necessary and changing your attitude when dictated for your own happiness. It’s not always easy, but the benefits to your soul are well worth the effort.
Choose to be happy! :))